Hello Sunshine!

Beneath the hustle and bustle of life, there's always something to be thankful for, something to be "jumping-up-and-down" excited about and always a space to enjoy the gift that God has bestowed upon us: LIFE.
So, for the days to come, I will...

Love myself as how God has created me to be. There will be times when the mud will get stuck to the hemline of my white gown but I know that there is someone who will wash away that stain and make it whiter than snow. I will learn to be more open to change and embrace the itsy-bitsy details that define who I am as a person.

Grow deeper in my faith and enjoy the journey I have with God, hence living up to my motto of 2 Timothy 2:22 (see above-right). There will be times of dryness and withdrawal, but in the end I will always run into His embrace where I can be safe from this perverse world and be loved unconditionally.

Be open to new things. You'll never know if you never try. I always thought that Michael Buble was such a fluff, but I gave him a chance and now, every quaver and alphabet of "Haven't Met You Yet" and "Save the Last Dance for Me" is on repeat in my mind's playlist. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Learn to step out of my comfort zone and not be judging. See the emerging colour beneath the black-and-white. Things take time to sink in, so I will learn not to assume and deprive myself of the great things in store for me because of fear. With God's help, I will break out of this fear and convince myself that life is just a learning journey of endless possibilities.

Have a laugh once in a while. I will learn not to take everything so seriously and be more relaxed. Enjoy the thrill that life holds. A joke a day, keeps depression away! ( copyright! HAHA)

-I just had to post this picture. Makes me laugh whenever I see it -

>.<

It all starts in the mind. Its like a pair of glasses. When all you see around you is scratchy, blur and misty, get a new pair of glasses. Suddenly, everything becomes clear and bright. Perspective, paradigm. Change it!

In which the heart speaks into words

Romantic poetry has always captured my attention with its intense feelings and the ability of the poet to potray the emotions sprinting through his heart with the use of simple words. For me, personally, this particular genre of poetry has allowed me to connect with the beauty of words and literature.

Romantic poetry, in the words of Samuel Taylor Coleridge, a prominent romantic poet famous for his "On Posey or Art", sees it as “the mediatress between, and reconciler of nature and man”. This form of poetry, in my experience, quite often reveals itself after a long duration of thoughts and the sensitivity of the heart to such emotions.

Honestly, it didn't occur to me that such a genre exists in the vast spectrum of poetry. It was after countless of biographies and careful research that I finally found that I'm not as weird as I thought I was, seeing that most of my written works are of the said genre.

As much as I am to a certain extent very influenced by the heart, I'm eternally grateful that I also have a handbook, called "The Bible" to always remind me that God is greater than our hearts (1 John 3:20) and that wisdom and the cognitive departments of our being contribute in playing a role to make sure that our feelings and emotions do not fool us.

Lord Byron has been one of my inspirations as well, with his poem "She Walks in Beauty". It
potrays a beautiful scene of femininity as well as the use of imagery to describe his feelings.
His admiration and language very much stirs a string of emotions in my heart.


The other Romantic poet, John Keats has also inspired me with his works on nature. His poem "To Autumn" and "Ode to a Nightingale" was an enjoyable journey of "dissecting" for me.


And of course, my personal favourite, Elizabeth Barret Browning, whom I've enjoyed learning about during my literature classes back in Form 4. "Sonnet 43", the poem we studied has surprisingly made itself a home in my memory seeing that I can recite it by heart although I'm not in school anymore. Feeling the beauty of her language in her sonnets to Robert Browning, I was highly inspired to write one of my own. In which I did but of course will be kept in secret until I'm given the liberty to express it.



Romantic poetry, with its enigmatic language and the harmonious union of imagery and words have definately provided a way in for me to venture deeply into its wings. What I hope is that no matter how much I'm drenched in it, my eyes will never lose sight of the One who designed the human emotions and that my heart will hold steadfastly into His word, regardless of the tempest and raging seas that burts within my soul.

Up, up and away!!

We're all different.
None of us are made to be the same.
I wish I could internalize that thought.

OK, so I'm not the smart type. The one with the general knowledge and the type that has a high standard of vocabulary or can speak twenty languages. I wish I was useful. I wish that there was something about me that I can offer.
I wish that I wasn't so blur and mindless all the time.
I wish I was intellectual.
I wish.
I wish.

Self-centred freak.

Okay, okay *inhale, exhale*


People are different. They've got different ideas, different interest and different ways of thinking. Its these differences that bring us together because we complement each other, we are able to see things that others don't see, we can make a difference because of our differences. Eveybody has something to offer. If we were all carbon copies of one another, the world wouldn't have a splash of colour in it! It'll all be black and white.


So everytime I feel down and useless, I will tell this to myself.
I will encourage others.
I will encourage myself.

I can make a choice.

:-)

Bored and other stories...

I know this may sound really mindless but I have a latest craze for:

1. Chasing pigeons that lurk around the road when I'm walking to and fro the office and the Y2A. So cute to watch them run on their short legs and fly.
2. Doing mindless "girlish" fashion and other related quizzes on seventeen.com (don't blame me, my sister influenced me!)
3. CHUCK! Not because of Zachary Levi, but the show really keeps me animated! I like the wit and the sarcastic humour (who knew Casey would fall in love? HAHA!)
4. Reading '1 Timothy' and '2 Timothy' again and again. A lot of truth and insight to young people seeing that Paul was writing it to a youth. A youth with Greek heritage ;-)
5. Pinching and smacking my sister's juicy arms.

Other than that, I'm just bored. Spending the long weekend at my grandma's.

Wow, you geeks are good! ;-)

He's the secret. She's the agent =)
My current favourite TV Show -watching season 2 now-

NERDS ROCK!!!

*High 5!*

"Sarah: Wow, I didn't think people still named their kids Chuck. Or Morgan, for that matter.
Chuck: My parents were sadists, and carnival freaks found him in a dumpster.
Morgan: But they raised me as one of their own..."

Splashes of the day

Tired from a long day of work.
Trying to cope with the fact that I still have some housework to do and just because someone is still in school doesn't mean she can escape it all. She has become too lazy.

Children are just awesome.
Everytime they see you, they've got huge smiles on their faces and they just love hugging you. Although there's the language barrier between us, we somehow speak the same language.


Feeling for my best friend who is having a bad time. Wish I could be there for you and give you a big hug and a bowl of beef noodles just to make you happy =) Just hold on to your daddy above and keep saying good things to yourself, OK?


People should learn to be thankful for what they have. After today's house visitation, my eyes are finally opened to the poverty that people live in. At least you have electricity and water! Some are suffering!


It drizzled a little today as I was walking from the office to the Y2A (youth centre). Sometimes its nice to get wet in the mid-afternoon and let your mind float a bit while walking through the row of factories and mechanics hard at work.


Learning to rely on God for strength to overcome my deepest struggles. Though I'm now happy with what I see in the mirror, there are still days when I wish I could throw a piece of metal on my reflection. Its OK, the battle is the Lord's.


As much as I desire a person so much, I still desire a celibate life so I can concentrate on the great plans the Lord has for me. True love can wait. Purity is the best. Gotta keep dying little deaths everyday.


Currently writing a new, possibly heart-warming story. Still searching for inspiration but I can see that this story is gonna go far. All I have to do is get my "army" details and history facts right.



I will indulge in a good story today. A busy day deserves a real good book!

At times

At times when I set my sights on you
You never fail to amaze me
Your gentle eyes, your vast knowledge
The way you hold my heart in your hands
Gently holding it
So lovingly
Protecting it with your life

At times when I read your verses of love
Streams of admiration burst through my soul
Pondering your precious words, your deepest thoughts
Never knowing that you were a romantic at heart
Beneath the porcelain finish of your built
Lies a soft, noble heart
Skillfully crafted by the One above


At times when I hear your voice
Oh how my heart dances in delight!
Upon your assuring words, singing
through the miles that separate us
Listening to your thoughts, your heart's cry
As I quietly admire
The person that you are

At times when I feel your touch on me
My spine shivers, my insides twist
Your soft skin resting upon mine
When our fingers meet in hiding
In grave suspense and thrills
When you place your hands on my face
Looking deep into my eyes

At times when I include you in my prayers
I know the Lord will watch over you
I know He has great plans for you
And so I gradually release you to God
Because I know that you're in good hands
My soul rests quietly, tears shedding
Beneath the pain, the sun will still rise

And you'll always be in my heart

25th January 2010, 6.50pm

The Genesis

I am finally feeling a sense of fulfillment right now after arranging the current state of my life. No more lazy, feet-dragging around the house or spending useless time on the internet, but I'm finally doing some activites with my free time.
And one of them, baking!
Just Tuesday, I baked a batch of chewy chocolate chip cookies ( 'Chef At Home', Michael Smith's recipe) and they turned out great! I was very generous with the choco chips, mind you and every bite was just awesome goodness. The bad side, I gave in to my 'sinful' desires and whacked most of it (besides my family) and now they're gone! And it was barely 3 days of its existence.

CONCLUSION : I'm a real cookie-eater. (Like 'Nigella Bites')

This is my masterpiece! *jumps up and down with joy*. I know the cat mug is lame but I needed a little humour to go with it.
;-)

For some of you who don't already know, I am now working at 'Yayasan Kajian & Pembangunan Masyarakat' as a part-time volunteer, mostly teaching special classes for children and handling Youth activites around the Prima Selayang area.

This is the morning class where I'm helping out. Mostly with Maths and a little language here and there. The children are just lovely! Whenever I walk in, a few of them light up with megawatt smiles and some jump on me and shower me with hugs. Then there's the afternoon class where I teach language on Wednesday afternoons. The only difference is that the class is held at the Y2A centre so there's a great deal of walking and its a big group of kids.



I'm quite happy where I am now. Seeing that my hours are flexible and that I can pursue my driving (I've been practicing!). Thank God for mommy dearest who is helping me and making sure I look at the road and not at my toes ;-)

Plus, I've learnt to see things in a new perspective. This I have to thank the Lord because He has heard my prayers and is changing me from glory to glory. I am now less emo, more vibrant and a way better person!

CHEERS =)

Early wishes

So I'm back to blogging after a week.
A whole new blog.
AGAIN!
As much as it annoys me to create a new one, I'll just have to do it, right?
Thank you, google.
:-)